A pet dog is better than just getting married, especially in Pakistan, and here are my reasons why:-
First a disclaimer:
This is a satire piece and informative too. ‘married’ does not mean wife only. So don’t get offended. This information is just to help you understand the undercurrents of either getting married or owning a dog. I do not mean to be disrespectful to women.
Also, Charles Darwin thinks marriage is better than living with a dog.
A Dog does not nag
Dogs don’t complain even when you want to see Pak-India Champion’s trophy re-run for the 50th time. In fact, the dog jumps with you when Kohli is caught the second time.
A Dog receives you with a happy face
The dog doesn’t have to look like a maasi to show how hard she has been working all day—while in fact was chatting with her sisters’ non-stop for four hours
Dogs show unconditional love every time
You don’t have to smile for two hours while your mother in law talks about her lame children in order to get special attention from your dog.
A Dog doesn’t care how much money you bring home
The dog doesn’t need you to remember its birthday or anniversary. The next timely meal and a walk would be repaid manifold
Dogs keep the annoying self-righteous people away
The good thing is those self-righteous people who say ‘kuttay say barkat nai aati’ are the one’s who need to be kept away.
A dog knows who’s the boss in this MOFO joint
Unlike the wifey, who has to be reminded every time, the dog respects the boss of the house. You would not see the dog trying to own the joint and run it his way.
Dogs allow you have the freedom to hone your vices
If you want to have a joint, drink, smoke a Cuban or just want to lie around naked, the dog let you be you.
The dog doesnot judge you.
Dogs allow you your own private corner
With a pet dog, you can build your private meditation site in your home. The dog doesn’t care as long as he gets to see you every day at a fixed time and you do things together.
Dogs doesn’t mind your bit*hes
Like our neanderthal ancestors, you can live to the max and change your partner frequently. The dog only sees you and the positive vibes you give out. If the mate keeps you happy, the dog is happy.
The dog stays your friend; and doesn’t try to become your mother
My dog plays the games I want to play and go hiking where I want to go. My dog eats what I give it and loves hanging out with me where ever I travel to.
You can travel with your dog
Why wouldn’t you want a pet dog like that instead of getting married in Pakistan, when traveling is the only real entertainment here and not all wives like traveling.
You don’t have to spend spend and spend some more on your Dog
The dog has a short life span, usually 7 to 10 years. This means that you don’t have to maintain the dog and its kids for life. You can get another one if you grow tired of the dogs antics after it passes away. There are no divorce, alimony, or maintenance payments.
Not everyone needs kids, so Dogs are good enough
A dog person may not need the company of kids to build that enduring love, sense of purpose, and companionship. Not everyone is a have-children type. This kind of makes dogs the best alternative to having kids too, but that needs to be investigated separately.
Some people need more personal attention, which Dogs shower
Some people are more high maintenance and sensitive, and need someone like a dog to meet their bottomless pit of needs. A marriage partner would get exhausted and eventually split. A dog can never get enough of the boss.
Dog Bond way more than a wife can
It is not necessary that we get the necessary Oxytocin fix from our spouse. This is where you need to have a dog to give you a bonding boost every day after work. If you have something to bond to, it makes life more bearable.
The spouse needs saving, the dog is your bodyguard
A German Sheppard beats a spouse in protecting your behind hands down. This is because the dog sees the body language and does not make a mistake about who the bad guy is.
For a longer and more fulfilling life, keeping a pet is very important ( read this). Nothing beats a faithful, friendly, and loving pet dog for that. A dog is one of those things in life that people must experience once, before passing away.
While we are discussing Dogs and marriages, people love their furry pets so much that they even arrange pet weddings and marriages with their animals complete with matching dog and owner jewelry bling and a certificate.
In conclusion, a pet dog is definitely better than getting married, in Pakistan.
Also read, Travel Dog breeds in Pakistan